October 10th, 2009 -- by Bacchus
Is The Internet Over For Me?
I’ve seen a lot of stuff on the internet. But now I’ve seen … everything?
Probably not. No. There’s probably no end to the creative genius of crowdsourced perversion. But if there were, this might be it. Behold:
I dunno. I may have finally reached the end of the internets.
Via It’s Good If You Like it, a tumblr suggested in my What Should ErosBlog Be Linking To? comment thread.
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This entry was posted on Saturday, October 10th, 2009 at 8:38 am. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response.
Shorter URL for sharing: https://www.erosblog.com/?p=3956
Shorter URL for sharing: https://www.erosblog.com/?p=3956
I read the description. I knew exactly what I was in for. Somehow, I was still surprised by what I saw on the other side of that link.
Now I know why they call that particular species of turtles “red-eared sliders”, they’re always embarrassed by their edgy fetishes…
Her panties are at her thighs and she is balanced in what I considered a somewhat-precarious position. And that info *totally* changes one’s reaction to it.
Ok no I’m just being a smartass so my only real comment is “Srsly? A poor defenseless turtle who can’t even fight back? Imma go have a talkin to to that photographer”
Oh geeze, where to start? Water sports is a particular kink but its leavened out by my fastidious and timid nature…all pissing done in a bath tub or shower so we can both get cleaned off immediately afterwards. So I’m probably in some really small minority subset of the greater ‘golden showers’ genre.
Second, I like to bike. Biking is my second favorite exercise. As I’ve gotten older falls are getting more dangerous for me. I hate falling anyways but inevitably once every few years I will be sideswiped by a car or just intersect with the wrong twig and go ass over teakettle. Ouch.
C. I have been a vegetarian by choice since the age of sixteen. Be kind to animals and all that rot. Several times in the past decade I have deliberately taken a fall in order to avoid what I first thought was a lump of mud or a rock but realized at the last moment was actually a living turtle (they really do move very slowly if at all when they are crossing the nearby bike path). I’m crazy nuts and a wimp to boot, I know, but I was initially titillated and simultaneously repulsed by the cute lady spritzing the poor critter–until I realized it was photoshopped (check the shadows, or lack there of, on the turtles back). I can breathe easier knowing it’s just a goofy sexy joke.
That’s my story and I’m sticking by it.
Jaguar, would you mind terribly having a quick refresher look at the ErosBlog FAQ? I value your regular comments, but your Photoshop comment is of the sort not usually allowed here. Photoshop assertions tend to start tedious arguments that cannot usually be resolved to anyone’s satisfaction, so I banned them years ago. Thanks for understanding!
Is it the end or just the beginning? I like the image
Actually I am aware of the Photoshop ban and I was making a joke about being an overly sensitive new age guy and needing to find a rational way to justify lusting over an image that is so politically incorrect. (Gee…I like Bambi but I laughed when Godzilla creamed him. Am I a bad person?)
I took the Photoshop ban to be about body part and clothes substitutions where someone is trying to perpetrate a deliberate fraud. I actually thought the people who made this image were benign and probably making a deliberate but subtle joke.
You run a lovely playground here and I wasn’t trying to push anyone’s buttons or start an argy bargy over things that can’t be conclusively proved. Clearly I won’t be taking over any of Rodney Dangerfield’s old gigs anytime soon. Sorry.
Sorry, Jaguar. I got the overall jocular tone of your post and knew you meant no harm, but I thought the PS assertion was straight. And for the folks who don’t know about the rule, I find it has to be very strictly enforced, because “photoshopped” assertions are like MiracleGro for flamewars, or chopped fishguts in shark-infested waters. Even a tiny bit can have astonishing and unwelcome consequences.
No harm, no foul, thanks for being so understanding!
I am so in love with that caption. Poor Matteo! :)
It is just the beginning for you, so just be it, don’t stop!
Wow, a bike posting with no limerick to caption it?
There was a young cyclist named Myrtle,
who peddled, to pee on a turtle.
Her piss seeped through his shell
and it burned him like hell.
He was there ever after infertile…
After all these years still my single favorite erosblog post…
It’s pretty high on my list, too. :-)