So recently The Nymph was telling me some anecdote about a male friend of hers whose wife only agrees to have sex with him on his birthday. You know the marriage is dead when you’re down to birthday sex.

Which makes this story pretty sad:

My birthday is in about 3 weeks and she asked what I wanted and aside from a Drum set and a kitten I told her I wanted a blow job. She laughed at me and said that a) the neighbors would just LOVE a drum set 2) I can’t have a kitten because she’s allergic to cats and c) “Yeah, whatever”. So then I said I’d like to have sex with my wife on my birthday and she said “Come on! I’m serious!”

Whatever she’s serious about, it ain’t the marriage….